Our Bittersweet Loss

Several weeks passed.  Weeks turned into months.  Something didn’t feel “right” anymore.  My gut was telling something. 

Thank goodness for networking on the World Wide Web.  I introduced myself to a young American volunteer at the orphanage she was living at.   He was writing a blog about the orphanage in an attempt to solicit donations.  I told him about our little girl, and he took pictures for us. 

We had a call with our agency at the end of January, and was told that there was an “uncle” that didn’t understand what adoption meant.  Our agency was sending their power of attorney out to his village to educate him, to make sure that he did understand that adoption was full and final, and that little Christabel may never return to Ghana.

Weeks later, the volunteer emailed me with the crushing, yet bittersweet news.  Christabel would never be available for adoption.  Not now, and likely, not ever.

Crushing. 

The loss of Tamirat was tragic.  In every. single. way. 

This was different. 

Without going into details, we called our agency the following Monday to let them know that we would no longer be pursuing her.  They knew why.  I didn’t have to explain.

Our agency returned to Ghana in April, 2012.  It was finally confirmed that Christabel went to live with birth family.  We don’t know if her uncle was her father, or if her uncle was her uncle, or if it was another family member.  But regardless, she went to live with family.

And, no matter what way I want to look at it.  Family first.  Preserve the family unit whenever possible.  Even if it means heartache for a family thousands of miles away.  She came first, and she will always be in our hearts.  Just like Tamirat.